Captain 35 Of The Space Vessel “Boogie”

 

Features samples of “Another One Bites The Dust” by Queen

 

CAPTAIN 35
Spaceship Command,
This is Captain 35 of the space vessel Boogie.

 

SGT. ZULO
Space vessel Boogie, this is Sgt. Zulo, Transmit security code now.

 

CAPTAIN 35
Scrimshaw. Cinnabar. Talon.

 

SGT. ZULO
Sandwich. Maywether. Han-ma-buki.

 

CAPTAIN 35
My car is in the Timon parking lot.

 

SGT. ZULO
Proceed.

 

CAPTAIN 35
Sgt. Zulo, we’re under attack,
By evil, vicious marauders.

 

SGT. ZULO
Federation terror squadron?

 

CAPTAIN 35
No. I think it’s the Romulans.
It’s tax time. You know how they get.
They hailed us,
Demanded we let them board our ship.
I said no, they’re not allowed.
I told them “go away, or I’ll jam you in THE EYE.”
They shot a bullet.
It hit our ship and we had to turn on our red lights.
It was horrible!
Send help.

 

SGT. ZULO
Roger, we’re on our way.
Remain where you are and we’ll be there shortly.

 

ENSIGN 2
Captain!
An unidentified vessel’s approaching!

 

CAPTAIN 35
Call them up on the phone.

 

ENSIGN 2
They’re not answering!

 

CAPTAIN 35
Put up the shields.

 

ENSIGN 2
Shields are up!

 

CAPTAIN 35
Lock on to their motors.

 

ENSIGN 2
Locked on.

 

CAPTAIN 35
Shoot a bullet at them!

 

ENSIGN 2
No damage!

 

CAPTAIN 35
Turn on the red lights.

 

ENSIGN 2
Lights are on!

 

CAPTAIN 35
Kill them.

 

[explosion]

 

 

[c] 2005 Russ of America

 

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