Flaccid Horn

I love electronic car horns.

 

You know when you get into some shit in traffic — some motherfucker cuts you off and you need to give him a piece of your mind — your brain quickly evaluates the seriousness of the offense committed against you, and this time you decide that you’re going to give this sonofabitch a solid fifteen to twenty seconds of horn honking from your Honda BECAUSE HE’S A TOTAL JACKOFF!

 

God that feels so satisfying. Fuck that guy! Fuck that selfish guy! Fuck him right up the ass! “You can take this hot turgid horn right up your tailpipe, jerk!”

 

It’s all working out so well for you until the horn starts to drain your car battery.

 

HRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRrrrrrrrrRRRRrrRRREEEERRrrrrrpfffft.

 

That’s about as emasculating as it gets on your daily commute. The guy is still a jackoff and now he’s ahead of you.

 

 

[c] 2008 Russ of America

 

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