Archive for August 2009

Very Important New Macros

I have created a few great memes.
May they forever haunt your dremes:

 



 

I thought it was important that Dionne Warwick finally get her own nostril macro.

 

NOTE: There is semi-nudity somewhere below this line
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Glenn Beck The Clown

This was a commissioned work, but I had no problem working on it after I learned who this psycho jackass Fox News clown Glenn Beck is.

 

 

 

[c] 2009 Russ of America

 

Feel free to distribute this image as you like, but pls do not remove my credit.
If you want to hotlink to this image, please use this Photobucket link:
Glenn Beck The Clown

 

Milli Vanilli Super Duper Extended Ridiculous Intro Remix

I set back and thought about the extra pauses in the forced intro of this song by Milli Vanilli. It really mean a lot to me.

 

YOU mean a lot to me.

 

Well.

 

Girl.

 

You know it is the true.

 

The YoVille Dead Man

There was a dead man in my bedroom on YoVille today. I should know, because the dead man was me.



(click photo for larger version)

 

As you can see from the above photo, Ramzoid was noticeably upset at my untimely dispatching. In stark contrast, everyone else seemed preoccupied that I was wearing a bikini. They called me such mean names and falsely characterized me. Don’t you people know not to speak ill of the dead?! Betsy was particularly cruel. That made me sad because Read more

1x Las Vegas

I’m embarrassed to say that this past week was the first time I’d ever been to Las Vegas. The trip was long overdue, but I can explain: I don’t usually do well in dense crowds and I lost the taste for gambling at the age of 16 after getting hustled by some unconscionable grown-up asshole running a 3 Card Monte racket at a Jack In The Box in Agoura, CA.

 

My summary: Las Vegas is a lot like Sylvia Browne: Smoky, musty, dusty, dry, fake, smelly, trashy & it wants to steal all of your money.

 

[pause for laughter]

 

Ah, the city that never sleeps. Wait, that’s New York. Oh, the city of lights? Hm, I guess that’s Paris. Well, whatever they call Las Vegas, I was there and I had a lovely time with my generous bebbeboo, who staged us in a really comfortable, attractive suite at the Monte Carlo. It’s odd that such a nice, costly room would be managed by a lazy staff. The front desk goons were crabby assholes. We were told with no apology that Read more

Ultimate Reality Show Pitch: MACHO MAN

Here’s my pitch for the ultimate reality show: MACHO MAN

 

LAND
* A few dozen guys are thrown into the North American wilderness. Somewhere in the Yukon, I’d guess.
* Their first challenge will be to grow a mustache, like the old Brawny paper towel man. It’s got to be a good gay disco mustache or they’re tossed off of the show. “Anytime, Sal!”
* Surviving on their wits, their ability to eat bugs and rotting carcasses, to fish, build shelter, light fires and make weapons, they must try to not die in the forest. If they have to cuddle with each other to stay warm, so be it.
* If lucky, they will travel from the Yukon to the heart of Alaska where, if their skills of navigation have prevailed, they will arrive at our first checkpoint. Here the macho candidates will fell ten old-growth trees and prepare them for removal from the forest. Ah, but it’s old-sk00l felling! Axes and traditional saws — no power tools. They’ll definitely have to work together as lovers if they want to clear the forest.
* Those who don’t die from the tree felling will continue their trek until they reach our second challenge: To raise and train Read more