Oh for fuck’s sake, when someone asks you, “Hey man, how ya doin’?!” would you *pleeeease* stop sighing and whining about how BLEHHH you are?
When someone asks you how you’re doing, in that fraction of a second that it takes you to think of which one of your bullshit woes you want to complain about, you should quickly evaluate all of the good stuff that’s going on for you, or god forbid, be grateful to be alive for fuck’s sake! Maybe even take a breath and say confidently, “Ya know, I’m doing pretty good!” You’re goddamn right you are! And if you can’t do that kind of quick math in your head, here’s the super-fast answer: “I’m great!” It doesn’t matter if it’s true or not because *I* don’t care, and neither does anyone who makes the mistake of asking your miserable ass how you’re doing.
And anyway, what’s with trying to bring *me* down? What the fuck did *I* do to you?! All I did was feign concern for your well-being! Does that make me a villain? I hardly think I should be punished by being forced to be your counselor when I’ve got far more interesting frivolities to attend to.
[c] 2011 Russ of America
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