Tag Archive for breasts

Spending Time With Foreign Television

Whenever I go to an exotic new land such as Belize or Costa Rica, or even just a different city such as San Diego, I like to spend some time with their local television programming. I like to see what kinds of channels they have , what their “Channel 2 1/2 Action News Breaking News” graphics look like and whether or not the Read more

Geico Inshrewance

Geico is insuring everybody now. Automobile drivers, motorcyclists, ATV enthusiasts.

 

Lloyd’s of London is notorious for its “bumbum” policies, insuring the most inane shit:  Dolly’s breasts, Jimmy Durante’s nose, Catherine Zeta-Jones’ genitals and other actors’ junk and legs and stuff.

 

I wonder if anyone would sell me insurance to protect me in case a future girlfriend turns out to be a real nag or a totally selfish control-freak bitch. I’m sure I’d have to pay some pretty high premiums. Then again, if they were too high, her control-freak-ass would probably notice the bill fairly quickly and nag me about the expense and I’d get my money that much sooner. “This money should be in a high-yield savings account earning five percent!”

 

I wonder how that all works.

 

 

[c] 2008 Russ of America

Send Tits Immediately!

I’m sorry. There is no time to argue or to debate this point, I need you to put whatever tits you have into a box and ship them off to me immediately!

 

I’d love to stay and chit-chat, but I have a big project that I’m working on and it’s imperative that you send tits post-haste!

 

Russ of America

 

The Boobies Are In The Mail

I called FedEx and they have no record of any boobies being shipped to my house.  I gave them my work address too and again, no dice.

 

If the boobies are on their way, please let me know, otherwise I’ll have to sulk, and a sulky Russ of America is not a good Russ of America, especially given my seemingly insurmountable depression.

 

 

Russ of America