Tag Archive for clarisse

Fahrenheit 451 Cracks My Shit Up!

Fahrenheit 451 cracks me up because that stupid chick Clarisse lies about her age BY ONE YEAR!!! HAHAHAHAHAH!!! WTF?!!! Who does that? You don’t go from 16 to 17!! You go from 16 to 18. Or even 21! Dude, if I were 16 I’d totally lie to a fireman and tell him that I was 21 so that he’d buy me booze and then we would do it. I’m not exactly saying that *I* want to have sex with a book-burning fireman, I’m just saying that if I were a cute and smart 16 year-old girl with “thoughts in her head” I’d totally lie so maybe I could make my crush come true — the crush I might have on a sexy grown man in a uniform who has a responsible job working for the state or federal government doing something important like burning literature. HAHAHAHAHH!!

 

That guy totally deserves my booty! I’m a cute and smart 16 year-old girl with thoughts in her head who is willing to lie about her sexual age by one year, but maybe up to five years, especially in front of other people! But he’s got to buy me booze first and lots of it, which is why I’d probably lie and tell him that I was 21 at least. Unless he was cool with it, and then I’d just tell him that I was 16 because he’d probably get a real sexual thrill out of that and he’d want to give me more booze and you-know-what. HAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!

 

Also, another thing that makes me laugh LOL bigtime in Fahrenheit 451 is that one of the main guys is named after a fucking pencil (Faber) where the other guy (Guy Montag) is named after a paper company. HAHAHAH!! But Montag (as in Guy Montag) is also discussed in a lot of AP English classes because his name could be considered wordplay on the name Montague from Romeo and Juliet, really? How? Why? I don’t remember!!! BWAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA! Literature PWNAGE!!!

 

 

[c] 2009 Russ of America

 

Note: Sexual relations with anyone under 18 is probably a felony. This post was written for humor purposes and is not to be construed as endorsement of inappropriate sensual shenanigans. Check the laws in your region before misinterpreting a comedy piece or before doing funny things with YOUR piece.