Tag Archive for cunt

Answers To Your Jackoff Queries 5

The world’s most popular search engines send me tons of visitors who have tons of jackoff-related questions. Here are more examples of their helpless queries and my helpful replies:


Q: can i jackoff into your ass
R: No.


Q: how to suppress urge to jackoff
R: Try rubberbands.


Q: how to jackoff more than once
R: That’s easy — Jerk off a second time.


Q: can you get skinny if you jack off alot Read more

Quiz Results

Just took one of those awesome online personality quizzes and here are my results:



And some more thoughts on the topic of CUNT! (Podcast)



[c] 2003 and 2009 Russ of America


1x Las Vegas

I’m embarrassed to say that this past week was the first time I’d ever been to Las Vegas. The trip was long overdue, but I can explain: I don’t usually do well in dense crowds and I lost the taste for gambling at the age of 16 after getting hustled by some unconscionable grown-up asshole running a 3 Card Monte racket at a Jack In The Box in Agoura, CA.


My summary: Las Vegas is a lot like Sylvia Browne: Smoky, musty, dusty, dry, fake, smelly, trashy & it wants to steal all of your money.


[pause for laughter]


Ah, the city that never sleeps. Wait, that’s New York. Oh, the city of lights? Hm, I guess that’s Paris. Well, whatever they call Las Vegas, I was there and I had a lovely time with my generous bebbeboo, who staged us in a really comfortable, attractive suite at the Monte Carlo. It’s odd that such a nice, costly room would be managed by a lazy staff. The front desk goons were crabby assholes. We were told with no apology that Read more


*I* don’t see what the problem is, but “cunt” is a word nobody in America wants you to use. But I LOVE the word! I think it’s a great serrated, vicious word and it has a very important place in my linguistic arsenal. I tend to use it whenever I need an eye-opening vulgarity. It’s the kind of word that smacks you right across the back of your head. But only if you live in America. People in England apparently use it with virtually no repercussion, “Oh go take a bloody barth, you soppy little cunt!” But in America “cunt” is equivalent to the N-word for women. If you call a woman a cunt, you’re Read more

Dian, Jane or Dora? Who’s The Real Scientist?

I’ve seen a lot of things out there in life. A lot of things. And sometimes it’s difficult to discern truth from fiction, especially when it comes to liberal, bleeding-heart feminist propaganda. So I will use the scissor of conservative truth to cut through that politically correct feminist dogma and to expose the truth. But first, a quiz:


Please think about this very carefully for a few minutes. Of the following three women from history (or maybe more appropriately from “herstory”,) who is an actual scientist and who is fake? Dian Fossey, Jane Goodall or Dora The Explorer?



Yes, I know your kind. You’re semi-literate and you’ve been taught some really compelling “facts” by some very “reputable” people. The brainwashing likely began as early as nursery school when Read more

Naughty Scrabble Words

I have a weakness: if I’m playing Scrabble and I can spell a naughty word, like sex, dick, cunt or fucker, I’m going to, even if there is another word that will give me quintuple the value of points. Winning isn’t everything to me.



[c] 2009 Russ of America