I was reading an article on CNN.com today and I made the mistake of browsing the comment section. Some dude posted, “There is no compromise with any Terrorist organization until they are fully eliminated from the world, then we can have a peaceful life.” [sic] I assume that he wrote these words with a straight face. There is no doubt in my mind that the poster believes it is possible to remove all terrorist organizations from the world.
Cool. So how does that belief system work exactly? How do you fight terror? With guns? If someone’s terrorizing you, and you go kill them with guns, aren’t you terrorizing them back? Haven’t you now doubled the terror in the world? Before you rage on me, you should know that I’m just processing the argument literally. I’m not placing a value judgment on revenge, because hey, I think revenge is pretty awesome. I often practice something I call “pre-venge” in anticipation of you screwing me over. So like if I have a reasonable belief that you’re about to do something uncool to me, I might pre-venge you by doing something uncool first in order to prevent you from doing it to me. A-HA! Tactics!
Terror is an emotion, like anger or hate. No matter what progress you make, there’s always some yahoo who’s angry at something or who hates something. Like me. I hate lots of things. The smell of puppies is a good example; I hate the smell of puppies. Puppies are fun, puppies are cute, but I hate the way they smell — bitter and dirty. It’s not a rational hatred like the hatred of western civilization, but it’s a hatred nonetheless. So how do you fight an irrational hatred? Yeah, you could force me to attend puppy odor sensitivity classes or you could bomb my house, but does that solve the problem? There’s always going to be someone out there who hates the smell of puppies.
Freshness is only skin deep. It’s hard enough trying to keep your body fresh and clean, but anal odors and ass sweat can be a tougher beast to tame… especially when you are an energetic, active person on-the-go!
You’re constantly on the move, so body heat, bacteria, cheap clothing, and sitting can be a formula for DISASTER! And that’s no good if you’re trying to get up that ladder and maintain a professional impression.
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What the hell is that nasty freezer smell? I know it can’t be food because for the first 2 years after purchasing my brand new refrigerator I didn’t use the freezer for anything except for a big bag of ice that sat there for 2 years, and to make the occasional ice cubes in an ice cube tray. In that span of time, you could totally smell that freezer smell inside the freezer. Weird. And then I stopped making ice cubes for a while (it was winter) but I’d left the trays inside of the freezer. When I tried making ice cubes again, they were fucking horrible! Nasty! Weirdly pungent but not quite in a rotten meat way. Like, ultimate stale smell or something. I threw out the cubes and put the trays back in the freezer because I had nowhere else to put them, then began using the freezer a little more normally over the next few years.
This past weekend my bebbeboo saw that I was about to throw out the ice trays and she asked me why. I explained that it was because they smelled like freezer and you can’t get that smell out. She said that all I had to do was wash ‘em, and so she starts washing ‘em. With soap and everything! When she was done, she took a big sniff, yelled “EEEEWW!!” and threw the trays in the recycling bag.
Freshness is only skin deep. It’s hard enough trying to keep your body fresh and clean, but anal odors and ass sweat can be a tougher beast to tame… especially when you are an energetic, active person on-the-go!
