October 19th, 2009
Alfred Hitchcock Presents
Legendary director Alfred Hitchcock presents his greatest motion picture spectacle.
[c] 2009 Russ of America and Ron Corcillo
June 17th, 2009
Heterosexual Male Assplay Primer
Heterosexual Male Assplay Primer
By Russ Carney of America
If you are a sexually active heterosexual man, at some point in your life you will meet a nice young lady who will want to put something in your ass. Most often it’s a finger or two, but it’s quite possible that one day she’ll hint about bubble plugs and strap-ons.
Unless you had cool parents who gave you The Talk on heterosexual assplay, you may have reservations about this sort of activity and wonder if letting your girlfriend put objects in your butt de facto makes you gay. I can assure you that the answer is no, or, more honestly, the answer is maybe. But let’s not get so hung up on the pink area of maybe, I can help you to define the black and whiteness of heterosexual male assplay. Firstly though I want to mention that … Click Here to Read On! …
May 29th, 2009
Eight Exciting Ways I’d Like To Fuck Martha Stewart For Christmas
1) Martha’s shapely ass glows softly from the opaque morning light seeping through the window of the quaint Cape Cod bungalow as I do her from behind.
2) Martha mounts me in a gorgeous oak four-post bed. The weight of her body and an ornamental wreath hung around her neck pushes me deeper into the familiar comfort of the delicate goose-down duvet. We have sex in the … Click Here to Read On! …
May 20th, 2009
Scamming
I remember when making out was called “scamming.”
“Did you and Blanca do it?”
“Naw dude, we just scammed.”
“Just scammed? That’s it?”
“Yeah, well, I wasn’t even trying to do anything more than that. I just scammed with her to get back at my ex for scamming with Jose.”
“When did she scam with Jose?”‘
“Right after we broke up, homes. You remember. It was at El Boxer’s party. I mean, we were technically broken up, but it was still bullshit that she scammed with him because he’s a punk-ass. And anyway, Blanca’s older sister came home early so we had to stop.”
“You think you’ll scam on her again?”
“Naw. We’ll just do it. We already had the foreplay.”
[c] 2009 Russ of America
March 19th, 2009
Green Earth Tip #4
4)
If you like to have sex with the lights on, consider switching to compact fluorescent bulbs, which can save up to 75% of the energy required to light an incandescent bulb of comparable illumination.
Alternatively, it is an even greener practice to continue to have sex with the lights off, which should be mandatory for most of you.
[c] 2008 Russ of America
March 13th, 2009
Naughty Scrabble Words
I have a weakness: if I’m playing Scrabble and I can spell a naughty word, like sex, dick, cunt or fucker, I’m going to, even if there is another word that will give me quintuple the value of points. Winning isn’t everything to me.
[c] 2009 Russ of America
August 27th, 2008
A Sexy Note To Myself
Dear Russ of America
I am not ashamed to touch your penis or to put my tongue in your mouth.
Yours affectionately,
Russ of America
[c] 2005 Russ of America
February 2nd, 2008
How To Get Along With Her Parents
How To Get Along With Her Parents
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1. Radiate confidence
2. Know your place
3. Be witty, but don’t be a smart-ass.
4. Be intelligent
5. Contribute around the house; help while cooking; help with the dishes.
6. Write thank-you notes
7. Make love to mom.
[c] 2008 Russ of America
June 14th, 2006
How To Score A Free Meal From Granny
How To Score A Free Meal From Granny
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1) Put on the t-shirt from a skeleton costume.
2) Show up at Granny’s house as planned.
3) “Oh my goodness, you’re a bag of bones! Eat something!”
Alt:
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1) Take off your skeleton costume.
2) Make love to Granny.
3) Stay for breakfast.
[c] 2006 Russ of America
June 12th, 2006
How To Make Love Like A Pro
How To Make Love Like A Pro
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1) Have sex
2) Feign interest
3) Charge money
[c] 2006 Russ of America
